2020-07-03 — An Unexpected Re-Connection

Hey, ya’ll, happy almost 4th! 😊

It’s been a whirlwind for me over the last 24 hours. To be honest, right now, I’m… not sure how I feel. I think it’s a mix of a range of emotions. There’s excitement. Nervousness. Hope. anxiety (if that’s any different from nervousness), fear… concern, a little peace, a little happiness…

Last night, as I was about to pass out asleep, at pretty much the exact same time I posted my blog entry, I received a text message on my old phone number. I thought the number looked familiar to me, and I was really nervous. I thought maybe it was the phone number of one of the old friends who was in the middle of the huge experience that I’ve been writing about going through–the one about holding on or letting go.

I replied. “Yes 😊. How can I be of service?”

I tried to reverse lookup the phone number online, and the results seemed to lend more credence to the fact that it indeed could be that person (the message was simply asking if the phone number still belonged to me, but there was no self identification from the writer).

What followed was indeed a message from that person. I was shocked. This was a person who’s friendship I’d valued greatly, but things had… happened… and I hadn’t communicated with that person for more than four years, and now… here we were. 😶

We had a very brief text conversation, which was followed by my receiving an email from that old friend this morning, which was followed by me choosing to take the entire day off (again) in order to devote time to something that was so absolutely valuable for me and I think also for that person, too.

It’s been… wow.

We’ve been communicating much of the day, on and off, working through some old experiences, trying to better understand everything, searching for truth. It’s been, for me so far, a good experience, though not easy at times. I hope it’s been the same for my old friend. I guess I’m sort of repeating myself.

I’m a tad concerned that perhaps I’ve shared too much or said something amiss, as I haven’t had a reply for a good while now, and that gets the little nerves and worriers going, but I’ve tried to do my very best in the conversation, and I hope all is well. Time will tell.

Please send send positive thoughts/prayers/good vibes, whatever, to everyone involved, as it’s not just us two, but others as well who are part of what’s been happening today.

#1. I’m grateful for this opportunity to work through these things today. I don’t know how long this opportunity will last, but I’ll be grateful for it as long as I am privileged to have it.

#2. I’m grateful that though I was fairly anxious for much of the day, and it was hard to get any work done at all, that I was at least able to get my tech where he needed to be and get him a full day of work.

#3. I’m grateful for several means of electronic communication. In this process we’ve used three different mediums. It’s a blessing.

#4. I’m grateful for fans and air conditioning. It’s been hot hot lately, and I’m grateful that here in the house, it’s nice.

#5. I’m grateful that though I haven’t been able to eat much of anything today (when I get nervous/anxious eating is super hard. Have to force feed myself), I’m only on edge right now and not back over it. I still have to work hard right now not to crash again. It’s been hard to take care of myself today. Some people eat when their stressed/nervous. I can’t. I’ll lose wait, starve, fall over dead from lack of nutrition, but until the nerves/fear/pass, nothing’s getting in my stomach unless shoved in there.

Well, folks, thanks, in advance, for your well wishing for all of us involved in this exercise. It’s pretty amazing that it’s happening, however it turns out.

Loves and hugs to all.

Lift the World.

~ stephen