Hello, my Lovelies, 🙂
Happy Monday.
Today has obviously been different than the previous three weeks and three days, as I wasn’t spending much of the day communicating with my dear friend.
Instead, I spent pretty much the whole day just working. The day started when I woke up to my alarm with a bit of a start at 7:30, and, since I didn’t do the schedule before going to bed as I ought, I had to immediately rush getting in contact with a bunch of customers, so I could make the schedule and be sure Robby (pseudonym for my tech) was going to be able to get started at his normal hour. It would have been good had I gotten the schedule done last night, and to be honest, I’m behind today as well. But… it’s only 10:45, and scheduling shouldn’t take that long today because I tried to be a little more on top of things during the day.
Woot woot!
Here’s to progress. 😀
Happily, that’s not the only progress I’ve made today. I took a few minutes to do the dishes, clean the sink, do some laundry, and get the pulled weeds and grass clippings off the lawn, so they wouldn’t suffocate the grass underneath and create those lovely little dead spots that take… forever to grow back during the hot, much dryer summer months. Those little clean ups all make a little bit of progress toward my goal of getting the little things done when they need to get done. I also brushed my teeth, which I haven’t been very good at lately, and that’s progress toward my goal of taking care of my body, so that I’m better able to be a blessing to others in the future (better teeth = fewer dentist bills = more money to use to lift my future family and the world).
Anyway, so that’s all good.
I feel like I also made a little bit of progress being patient with cars today and trying to stay in a good space. There were times I could have gotten stressed out or frustrated, and I wasn’t devoid of those feelings, but I think I was able to deliberately derail at least some of the negative emotions that I’d probably have let advance a littler further in the past.
As the day went along, I had a handful of new goals come up that I added to my Becoming Who I Want to Become list. I’m sure I’ll keep adding to it regularly as I butt up against areas of my life I’d like to improve. It’s actually pretty exciting to think about working on each of these things because I’m determined to conquer them, and thinking about life having overcome/conquered/accomplished these things… that’s gonna be a pretty sweet place to be. And… well… I’m determined, so it’s just going to be a matter of time. And however long and hard the road, I’ll walk it. I’ll succeed. And each one I conquer will be a new vista from which to take in the view life, and I’ll be grateful, grateful for progress.
One of the things that came up today was that I’d like to become the type of person who doesn’t get stressed out or overwhelmed when things pile up and/or the pressure is on. I just want to take it as it comes, realize I can only do what I can do, and whatever will be will be.
No sense worrying about what I can’t control, right?
So… yeah… I really hope to conquer dealing with pressure and stress with a peaceful, calm, resolute heart, and today I feel like I made a little bit of progress. I think at least at one point, I just… let at least some of it drift away like smoke on the wind.
Man, if I can accomplish these things on my list… it’s gonna feel sooooooo nice! And do you know what else? I’m gonna focus on the good things a lot more each day. I’m still gonna keep my little daily list of things to work on and improve, but I’m mostly going to focus on the positive. And do you know what else? I’m gonna give myself a big old fat pass when I have bad days and screw up. Why? Not to excuse myself, but I know myself. I know my heart. I know I’m a good person trying to do good things, and when I crash and burn, like will inevitably happen, it’s gonna be temporary. It’s gonna be an abberation, and I’m gonna give myself that big old fat pass because I know what I’m trying to do and become, and I’m not looking for excuses to quit or wallow about lazily. I will get up. I will fight… because that’s who I am.
Please forgive me if this comes across as arrogant in any way. I assure you, that’s not how I feel in my heart. This is simply about my personal growth and who I am and who I’m becoming and has nothing to do with anyone else.
I’m determined to give my all to this pursuit. No floating. No dipping just my toes in the water. I’m gonna climb the tree, grab that rope swing, speed down from the heights, and kamikaze myself into the water.
Determined.
Well… with that tangent out of the way,
#1. I’m grateful that I was able to get to get my second customer’s truck taken care of. He’d called on Saturday with it broken down in a parking lot, but we were too busy to help. He was a referral from a friend of mine, and so he had the truck towed to his house. The job was one I actually wasn’t comfortable doing personally (it was a big F350 diesel with clutch master cylinder air issues and an issue with the clutch pedal itself), but the gentleman needed the job done, and he’d already waited a couple days. I went out there expecting to not be able to do the job, not being trained for that kind of thing (which I told him). I was actually cleaning up after my competition (again). Gratefully, I was able to figure out how to fix the truck right there while I was at it, and, well, he’s good to go! Blessing.
#2. I’m grateful that the fear I felt this morning, fear for how my future is going to look, was only sharp for perhaps a handful of minutes, if that. It settled into more of an underlying mild anxiousness, that would come and go throughout the day. As of this moment writing this, I’m feeling calm and at peace. Even able to smile a bit, and I’m grateful.
#3. I’m grateful for my brother Jim (step brother, but I’ll refer to as my brother from now on). I called him last night hoping to get a blessing as I move forward with some decisions I’ve made about my life. He couldn’t come last night, but he came over today, and I talked to him about what’s been going on, what the current circumstances are with my life, and where I’m headed, and he had some good advice for me, and I he was able to give me a blessing, which was nice as well.
#4. I’m grateful that this computer, though some of it’s keys don’t work so well and need to be manhandled a bit to work, nevertheless works and is sufficient for my needs. It was dirt cheap, and it’s fabulous. I think it was like… $60?
#5. I’m grateful to have been able to get off top dead center on those little things. For a good while now, I’ve been emotionally spent, making it hard to do much at all. I’m still quite spent, but I’m… moving better than I was.
#6. I’m grateful that my attitude has shifted so much lately. I’m not sure exactly where it’s all come from, but I’ve been easier on myself than I’ve ever been, I think, lately. It’s been nice. And do you know what? I think I’m making just as much, if not more progress personally because of it. It’s so nice!
#7. I’m grateful that I for the relative peace and determination I feel right now. I know it could all change in 10 minutes, but as of right now, I’m moving forward, letting go of what is out of my control, letting go and letting God, if you will, and I’m just going to bust my little butt to become the best person I can become and do my absolute best to leave the world better off for my having been born into it.
Sooooo… it might sound arrogant of me, but as I look back over the day, I’m actually quite happy with how I lived my life today, and… other than getting this stuff done earlier, so I can be in bed at 10:30, I’m pretty happy with me today.
Yay! 😊
So… there you go, you wonderful people you. 😊
I hope that you had happy good days today. But if they were the hard good days or the sad good days, or any other kind of good day, at least it was a good day, right? 😉
I wish you beautiful dreams tonight.
Loves and hugs.
Lift the World.
~ stephen
Lift the World 
Beautiful, Stephen!
Thanks, Tish. 🙂