Good day.
Of course, as we all know, every day is a good day: It’s just good in different ways.
And today was a take-a-few-more-steps-toward-becoming-who-I-want-to-become, kind of a good day; and it was a make-a-bunch-of-progress-on-the-trails-through-the-woods kind of a good day; and it was a get-my-lumberjack-on kind of a good day. 😊
I actually did my 5×5 (well, most of it) today for the first time in a long time, house cleaning, garage cleaning, room cleaning, and lots of “yard” work (trails…). Felt good to get back to that. Ever since slipping out of my routine what… a month ago now? I haven’t managed to get back in properly, slipping on so many things every day. It’s amazing how easy it is to just fall off the wagon completely. That’s one of the reasons I don’t let a single day go by without writing in my journal. I’m just personally terrible at getting back to the routine once it’s interrupted. We’re almost at 9 straight months of journaling every day.
😊
Good stuff, though. Good conversation with Captain Universe this morning after family gospel study and breakfast. Good “meditation” session as I listened to a recording I made of some things I feel like God has told me. That really helped to ground me a bit. I also managed to turn the corner a little bit on the struggle that I have that I’m afraid I’m not gonna get married, or that it might not happen until I’m old old. Or something.
I was struggling a couple days ago, and Cory was like, but aren’t you kind of excited for the opportunity to face those challenges and grow? (something like that, anyway). Well, I’m happy to report that today, though it wasn’t and isn’t easy, by any means, today I was able to turn that corner a little bit and to look at my current circumstances and to not just say “bring it on” (which can sometimes be sincere but with the proverbial gulp and swallow after it), but to actually be a little excited for the opportunity to face one of my biggest fears, meet it head on, and just… be excited for the growth opportunity I’m presented instead of fearful for what I might not have.
Which reminds me of a quote… Let’s see… I guess we’ll do two thoughts of the day today, because this one just popped into my brain: “Some of your hurts you have cured, and the sharpest you’ve even survived. But what torments of grief you’ve endured from evils which never arrived.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson
Yeah… I do that. World class fretter here. Yup, that’s me.
But… not for long. Imma let that go, as they say in these parts. I’m gonna let go of my fears–all of them. It might take me a little while. Might take me a long while. But they gonna be banished. 😊
Anyway, so I felt good about that progress today, perhaps only a day or two after mentioning my hope of looking at these challenges as exciting opportunities to grow instead of as pains to be endured or pushed through.
Since it’s a choice of perspective I can have, might as well choose the optimistic one that is grateful and excited for the opportunity for growth, which lets me float over the trial to a certain degree, instead of trudge through it overwhelmed and discouraged and depressed.
Right?
Right.
Easier said than done, for sure, but it today was good positive progress in the direction I’m hoping to… uh… float. 😁
In other news, I added roughly another hundred yards of trails through the woods today. Exhausted myself in the process but made fabulous progress. I was thinking about the fact that two of the trails open into the mowable part of our yard, and I was thinking that it might feel a little awkward for those who live in the other hill homes to have to enter the mowed part of our yard to get to the entrance to another path, so I added two connecting paths, one that allows you to make the whole loop without having to enter our yard, and one that allows you to take a shortcut if you don’t want to do the whole loop.
So… that was good. And exhausting.
I ate lunch, went out and looked at a possible present for my mom and myself, but it was not to be today, so I came back, grabbed my ax, and went to town on a cluster of dead sassafras trees that died probably from the last major drought several years ago.
I love the smell of sassafras wood. It’s fabulous. I think I might bring some to scent the house, or at least my room, with.
Aaaaaaanyway… so I chopped a bunch of dead trees down in the same area that I did the same thing with the chainsaw last night. You’ll be happy to know that I did so wearing gloves and eyes.
I chatted with my friend Cory. Please send positive universe vibes/prayers his way. I think a lot of people I’m close to are getting hit with some pretty heavy things.
Same request for my friend, Kimmi. Some tough tough things going on.
On a positive note, my friend Allison and her health issue. Good news. She’s still alive! And, cross your fingers, she might have figured out the issue. She realized that her first attack came about a month after she’d started rolling her own cigarettes to save money.
She also realized that she hadn’t felt quite right since she’d started using those home-rolled cigarettes, and she made that connection to the cigarettes. She started smoking her old store-bought brand, and boom, she started feeling good again, and she hasn’t had the issue happen again. So… cross your fingers, she might be okay from here on out, and if she’s not, she’s got an EpiPen to save her life.
Well, folks, 39. It’s a little hard, but there’s that opportunity to be excited about growth instead of discouraged and depressed to have another year tacked onto my age without my special someone at my side. But… I’ll keep working for it. It’ll happen one of these day. 😊
“But if not…” “…give me this mountain.”
#1. I’m grateful for hootenanni pancakes (spelling?). Today’s version with oatmilk and butter free. It was super tasty, and the whizzed up strawberries were fabulous on top. Thanks, to my wonderful mother for the birthday breakfast. 😊
#2. I’m grateful to have been able to make so much progress on the trails today. And with all the dead trees I’m cutting down, there’s plenty of wood to line the trails with if I want.
#3. I’m grateful it’s not tick season. I don’t know where they go during winter, but I like it. I’d love for them to find a permanent vacation in that place. 😁
#4. I’m grateful to have made a little more progress in cleaning out the garage. That was good, getting rid of at least one thing that was taking up space.
#5. I’m grateful for the B12 supplement that I have, that I was able to find one that seems pretty decent and is a methylcobalamin, not that the cyano is really that big of a deal, but if I can have the other and avoid the cyano altogether, why not?
#6. I’m grateful for all y’all who called to wish me a happy birthday. Thanks, for your love and support. 😊
#7. I’m grateful for those who are acting as support people for me right now with the porn addiction stuff. Thanks!!!
#8. On that note, I’m grateful to be another day clean and sober. 11 days now? Not sure. Yeah… I think that’s right. And I added a message to my phone screen as a reminder, just like I’ve added to my computer screen.
Love, not selfishness. That’s what I want to give to this world.
Thought of the Day (#2): “By becoming the answer to someone’s prayer, we often find the answers to our own.” Dieter F. Uchtdorf
Well, my lovelies, it’s another day in paradise. Thanks, again, for your love and support. Thanks, to all of you, those I know and communicate with regularly, those I know but don’t get to talk to, and those I don’t even know. Loves and hugs to all y’all.
Lift the World.
~ stephen
Lift the World 