Hey, folks, happy Sunday.
It’s been an interesting day. I relapsed last night. It was late. I finished my post and was like, “I’m gonna check the news.” Now, I’ve felt like I shouldn’t look at the news. It can, sometimes be a trigger, and it’s usually an unnecessary downer as well, but I hadn’t looked at it in a long time, and I was like, “This one time won’t hurt. It’s been a long time.”
Well… triggered on CNN.com by a very inappropriate picture. Fox News still takes the cake for frequency and multitude of inappropriate (to my standards, anyway) stuff, but CNN, apparently, has been feeling left out.
Anyway, triggered. Relapse. Short night’s sleep.
Fortunately, the entire day today, from after a late breakfast until after dark was spent helping build the deck for Chrysti’s arrival this week. So… I didn’t take any time to feel sorry for myself or stew over things or be discouraged. There was too much to do to help get things ready, and that was actually great for me.
I mostly measured boards and cut all day. Probably 5 or 6 of us working at any given time with a few who were there all day and same who were there for part of the day.
I’m exhausted. Up late, not enough sleep (though I was wide awake and got up anyway), then a full day of working carrying boards, measuring, cutting, placing, screwing in, etc.
#1. I’m grateful to be able to help, grateful that my body works well enough and that I can run around doing this stuff all day. I’m a little sunburned. My right knee is swollen. Both my knees will probably be angry with me tomorrow and possibly for days. Maybe I should ice them… Anyway, but my body worked well enough to help, and that was a blessing.
#2. I’m grateful to not be down really at all from last night. Get up. Brush off. Try again. Won’t think about how many times I’ve relapsed in the past. Doesn’t matter. Just gonna keep trying.
#3. I’m grateful to be in relatively good spirits. Things have been crazy lately, and I have not chosen very well (choosing to overload myself at work by just… saying ‘yes’ over and over and over. I’ve been saying no a lot as well, but I’m just still saying yes too much.
#4. I’m grateful to be able to crawl into bed tonight and sleep. I’m very very tired. There are those who don’t have the luxury tonight. Those who have had things come up, and they’re already exhausted, and they’re discouraged, but some necessity is keeping them up in that state, and I get to go to bed. I’m grateful.
#5. I’m grateful to have family and friends who care about me, reach out, encourage, uplift, support, etc.
Love to you all.
Lift the World.
~ stephen
Lift the World 