I’m not going to lie: It was really nice to sleep in Cory’s Suburban again last night. It’s much more comfortable than my Civic. 😁
Thanks, my man.
It was also great because today Cory and I had planned to hang out pretty much all day, so I was already here, and we did; and it was lovelyful. 🙂
We grabbed breakfast at a little cafe thingy up on the east side of 33rd South toward the freeway. I don’t remember the name of the place, but I got multi-grain waffles and something called ancient grain pancakes–whatever those are. 🙃
We had a great conversation about… whatever it is that we talked about that I don’t remember anymore. 😆
The day is a bit of a blur at this point with my brain ready to shut down. 🙃
We had a brief little chat (Mostly Cory did) with our waitress whose mom had just died. 😞 I think Cory was able to make her day a little bit, partially because he had a carpenter’s pencil on the table he’d gotten out, so I could draw a little diagram on a napkin to explain a concept, and it reminded our waitress of her dad who was a carpenter but who had also passed away. Cory gave her the pencil, and she said it was the best tip she had received that day. 😊
Cory is such a great guy and a great support.
There are so many people going through so many challenging things right now. Cory has things he’s battling . I certainly have been through my fair share, as y’all are well familiar. Lots of highs and lots of lows. Lots of ups and lots of downs. It’s been like a roller coaster for quite a while now.
I think one of the most challenging things for me, and one of the reasons why there are so many ups and downs is that the most challenging experience of my life is an ongoing experience that has yet to resolve and is an absolute battle almost all the time. It’s exhausting and mentally and emotionally draining. Sometimes I’m able to hold on to faith and trust, and when I am, I do really well. I feel peace and happiness. That can last for a little while, maybe days (lately), but then nothing changes, and the present realities continue just the same, and I generally start to doubt and fear a little bit again, and then I slide. And the cycle repeats.
I see sort of two ways out of the roller coaster ride. Either the experience that I’m battling through comes to resolution, or I figure out how to fully put my trust in God, with a correct understanding of who and what he is.
So far, neither has happened. And so far, as a result, the roller coaster of emotions continues. 😅
Cory and I both have a friend who’s battling through something similar right now, though likely harder than what at least I’m going through. I can’t speak for Cory about that.
I think one thing that I’m concerned about for her, though, is that she has someone in her life who, to me, keeps trying to put psychiatric diagnostic labels of this or that mental disorder on her because of the ups and downs she regularly goes through that we feel are more simply explained by and attributable to the very normal result of a soul-deep, ongoing, gut-wrenching, excruciating experience that, similar to myself and my experience, has yet to resolve but brings with it huge daily exhausting emotional challenges. It’s the constant battle of faith and trust in God with something so huge with such heavy consequences that just keeps going without clear resolution.
I think that the person who keeps pushing for the psychiatric diagnoses and meds and whatnot either doesn’t really understand the whole situation of what our friend is going through, or perhaps simply doesn’t have the experience to know how to give the needed support?
Of course, I could be totally wrong. We all know that, clearly, I’m not always right. And I don’t claim any spiritual insight at all here, just my personal opinions that might be wrong.
But I…we… (Cory and I talked a lot about her today) don’t think the psychiatric stuff fits. Personally, I would love first to see what consistent human-to-human personal and spiritual support and encouragement could do from someone with whom she can share everything freely and openly and honestly and safely and confidentially. I think maybe she goes through a lot of this stuff basically alone without anybody who truly understands and can be there for her through it all.
And that, along with the nature of what she’s going through itself… explains it all to me.
I certainly could be wrong.
I would love to be that support person for her myself, but I think I know somebody who might be better positioned than I am to be able to be that for her.
Anyway, so that makes at least four of us right now. 😅 The waitress (Melanie), Cory, myself, and our friend–all going through really rough stuff right now.
After breakfast, I drove us up into the uintas, where we found a beautiful little hard snow packed parking lot overlooking snow-covered field with a view of the snowcapped Wasatch mountains far in the distance.
It was beautiful, and we sat there on the boulders by the parking lot, the only people there, just chatting away about life and what’s going on for each of us, and spending some time also trying to help me work through my transition from car stuff to my book writing and non-profit stuff.
It was a great conversation, and I was reminded of the idea I’ve had of visiting one of my friends (tomorrow or Friday) who I used to teach with years ago at a private school. I haven’t seen her in years, and I thought it would be great to meet up with her. She used to teach just down the hall for me, but she doesn’t teach there anymore either, having left for… Multiple reasons. She still teaches, but in a different place.
Anyway, I think it might be cool to visit with her and maybe talk to her a little bit about the book that I’m working on.
Anyway, Cory and I chatted for a long long time, and though it was starting to get dark, instead of heading back down to the Salt Lake valley, we kept going east. 🙃
I was also hungry again, and Cory thought it might be fun to see if there was a cafe little restaurant in a little town, so we drove east until we got to the little town of Hanna, where we ate dinner at the Hanna Hilton Cafe and Bar.
That was fun. Super teeny town. Total tiny town feel. One guy, probably in his late 20s or early 30s running the restaurant, the bar, the kitchen, and the mercantile all by himself. 😶
We loved it. 😊
Cory and I continued having great conversations about life and things we’re thinking about and going through and trying to understand and everything, through dinner and through our drive back to Cory’s place in Millcreek.
Great day. Always a great day when I get to be with Cory. 🙂
I’m no longer regretting coming out here, so that’s great, and tomorrow I get to spend some good time with one of my brothers, so that’s gonna be lovelyful as well. 😊
Love and hugs.
Lift the world.
~ stephen
Lift the World 