2020-07-19 — The Days Roll On

Hiya, folks. 🙂

Happy Sunday.

It’s been my goal to get my journal/post done earlier than I’ve been getting it done. I took a step toward that a few days ago, starting a… 10 p.m. curfew of sorts. But I think it’s pretty clear that I’m going to have to knock it down to 9 p.m–maybe even earlier (curfew for being done with social things). We’ll see how it goes. I want to be up at 6:00 or 6:30, so that I can get myself going each day like I used to years ago–with exercise, study and meditation time, breakfast… I used to be so good. Up, gym, study/ponder, eat, work.

Bed at 10, up at 6. That’d be just perfect. Or 10:30-6:30. One of the two. We’ll see. Either way, I’m gonna need to be done with my social life at 9, so I can write here, and then be in bed on time.

Tonight, though, I was late for a good reason, and I wouldn’t trade it for the world. I was able to be there for a friend in need, and that’s one of my great honors in life. Honestly, the two things that I really want most in life (besides becoming the best person I can be), and I could really care less about just about every other thing this life has to offer in comparison to these, are a companion I’m “one” with to walk through the journey of life together, and people to lift and serve.

Other than that, give me dirt floors and rice and beans every day like so many in the poorest places on earth.

Just a companion and people to serve.

Anyway, it was a bit of a different day today. I didn’t have the perfect peace today that I had yesterday. Today, I was more just… calm. There was a slight undercurrent of anxiety that I had to fend off at times, but mostly I was calm, and that was still nice. I really wouldn’t mind that amazing peace coming back, but all is not sunshine and roses all the time. And I love the rain anyway.

Anyway, that’s not what I was getting at when I said it was a bit of a different day today. This is: I “went to church” for the first time in over a year and a half today! I put that in quotes because during Covid-19… there is no “church.” Each family has their own little service in their home as a family, and that’s it. But I drove to the other hill to my sister’s house, and I joined them for theirs. That was nice. I appreciate that they didn’t say anything to me at all about not having been to church for so long. They’ve been so wonderful that way. It was like nothing was different at all.

I played the piano for a good while today. I miss playing the piano, but I can’t read music, and so I play by ear or whatever I make up, and I get tired of playing my own stuff. But when you work as much as I do, you don’t have time to write new stuff, so I just get bored playing the old stuff. Maybe with my new work routine that seems to be taking shape (a lot less of me working on cars), I’ll have more time for writing new music. We’ll see.

Anyway, another day is past and gone. It’s almost 1 a.m., and I need to get to bed. I did sleep for almost 10 hours last night, though. That was nice.

Okay…

#1. I’m grateful for uplifting music. The friend that was having a hard time today is one who has music in the soul, and I was grateful to be able to find a song that I think was a help in a rough time. It was one I’d not heard before, but I was able to find it so quickly–right when it was needed, I think. Blessing.

#2. I’m grateful that I have now had two days in a row with an actual appetite. I’m eating again.

#3. I’m grateful that at least one of my pickup trucks is working. I like having a truck at my disposal.

#4. I’m grateful for mattresses, that I don’t have a dirt floor to sleep on, even though I’d be willing. It’s nice to have the incredible comforts I enjoy that so many in other places don’t.

#5. I’m grateful to be eating again. That means I might even be able to safely and reasonably start doing exercise again.

Folks, things are getting better for me. It’s mostly just a shift in where I’m putting my hopes and faith and trust, but it’s still much better. I had someone tell me today that I actually sound like me again, and that’s nice to hear. I’m starting to feel like me again, after sooooo long of being… someone else.

Anyway, good night, folks. Loves and hugs to all.

Lift the World.

~ stephen