I’m late. 10:49. Worked too much. Tired. Time for bed.
#1. Grateful I was able to get some cars done today. I did four cars, and David did five.
#2. I’m grateful to be in a better place than I was earlier today. It got pretty rough this morning and early afternoon. I starting feeling a bit better after I spent a little while chatting with Big Papi today, offering him my whole heart, trying to let go of something that has been my world for many years.
#3. I’m grateful to have been able to get the Durango cleaned out and organized. It’s been such a nightmare the last few weeks with it being a complete mess.
#4. I’m grateful for my mom for all the food she’s made. Since radically changing my diet, I’ve been terrible about bringing food with me to eat while working. It used to be that if I forgot food, I’d just grab some fast food. Well… that’s sort of a thing of the past, and I haven’t caught up with my new diet fast enough to be ready with food I’m bringing with me on the road. Anyway, I’m grateful to come home to food that’s been prepared that I can just heat up and eat. Very nice.
#5. I’m grateful to be clean and sober from my porn addiction. Hasn’t been very long… just… what… 9 days now? But I’m trying to stop taking it for granted. That’s one of the biggest challenges with this struggle. I don’t think about it much. Then when it comes, I’m not prepared for it, and I just crash. I’m trying to be better prepared, and I’m gonna try and acknowledge it in every journal entry here.
Thought of the Day: “Some day you will find out that there is far more happiness in another’s happiness than in your own.” ― Honoré de Balzac, Père Goriot
Lift the World.
~ stephen
Lift the World 
Oh, Stephen, big hugs. I invite you to take a breath. Close your eyes. For this split second, tell me what is wrong with this split second in time. Do your lungs inflate? Are your needs met? Are you alive and experiencing fingertips and nostrils and ears? I find when I’m in the worst of sadness, I need to scale it back, sometimes to the split second. Zero in on something I absolutely take for granted and reawaken the joy and wonder of it. Not a wide open cerebral gratitude, but the magnitude of magnifying a moment. Huge wonder. Overwhelming-every-cell gratitude. Sound usually does it for me. A bird. A song. I imagine a silent world. I imagine the gift that sound is. And, as I slowly zoom back out, restart my focus, I make it a point to really listen as I go through my day. When the blues try to push back in, my reset switch for the day is sound. It’s ubiquitous. Splendid. What about this split second is not as it should be? Nothing. It is as it was made and I am lucky to be made as I have been. Big hugs!
Thanks, Tish. 🙂 I do need to scale things back. Breathe. Stop overworking and overburdening myself. Thanks. 🙂
Thanks for your thought, very insightful.