I'm a bit paralyzed today. I can't even do the things I love--enjoy the rain on my day off, participate in the family meeting. I can't get myself to do anything but watch documentaries of various historical things and debates about the existence of God, etc. I'm just... paralyzed. Depression settling in. 🙁 ~ stephen

Impromptu day off today. Bookend relapses with a day full of service between. Certainly not a great day but... I'm gonna focus on the good. I chose to take today off instead of pushing myself further when I was already down. So that was good. I spent the day helping other people, fixing a couple … Continue reading 2021-05-01 — Trying to Slow Down

No, I didn't miss today. It may be 5:55 a.m., but I haven't gone to bed yet. In fact, I only just now walked in the door. It's been a long, very frustrating night. I've just been... livid. The day went decently well up until about 7:30 or so (warranty battery job, battery job, no … Continue reading 2021-04-30 — No, I Didn’t Miss Today

Hey, y'all! Happy... what day is it? Thursday! Happy Thursday! It's been an interesting day today. The story of today actually starts yesterday. I need to do my assessment, right? And it was raining pretty good yesterday, so I thought, I'll pull everything out of the Durango, throw it in the garage, and then that'll … Continue reading 2021-04-29 — I Will Listen Next Time

Good evening to y'all. Guess what? The skid steer arrived just in time. 🙂 It was gonna be a really stormy day today, so I chose to take it off and head on in to the DMV to get my van registered. I headed that way, and it was pouring down rain as I drove--pouring. … Continue reading 2021-04-28 — Justo A Tiempo

Holar. It's been an interesting day today. 🙂 I had a bit of a challenging but ultimately really positive conversation with a dear friend of mine last night after journaling. The convo lasted until after midnight, so I was late to bed, but I think really good things have already come from it, so that's … Continue reading 2021-04-27 — I… Did it Again. 🙃

Been a long day. Nightmare last night. Probably because I ate too much before bed, and that's... one of the most common causes of nightmares, so... yeah. Woke up at 2 a.m. Couldn't fall back asleep, then finally did who knows when, and slept until 7. So... that wasn't 4:25, but it's better than 8 … Continue reading 2021-04-26 — At Least I Tried.

Well, started off a bit rough. Relapsed again. But then, I had the thought of something to do that might lift me and another person at the same time, and we did it, and we were both lifted considerably, and that was fabulous. 😊 So, that was really good. Kind of going from dark to … Continue reading 2021-04-25 — From Dark to Light

I was dragging today. Not bad, just dragging. Just... burned out. I did four cars (diagnosis and belt replacement (crank pulley coming apart), diagnosis and spark plugs (misfire due to bad spark plug), headlight bulb replacement, and no start/bad noise trying to start diagnosis (seized AC compressor. Then came home relatively early (6:30 ish?) and … Continue reading 2021-04-24 — Relapse Inc.

It's almost nine. I'm not tired. I want to run around like a crazy person and get stuff done because I have energy and the motivation to do it, buuuuuuuuut... I want to get back on my schedule of getting up at 4:25. So... I need to discipline myself right now and not go put … Continue reading 2021-04-23 — More Progress.