(written on the 5th from now it’s taken previously)
I was up late today, and it was hot early. 🥵 Except that it… wasn’t? 😅
I was roasting to death, but the temperature was only in the ’80s, and to dry heat. But I felt like I was suffocating, back in the Midwest Arkansas heat.
The only thing that I can think of is my sun hat and my long hair holding a whole bunch of heat in.
I even tried dousing myself with water, which has always worked before in dry climates, but… nope, I just felt like I was… cooking.
I worked on the trench early, and then I spent a good little while chatting with my sister Heather before diving back into working on the trench.
I don’t remember how much I’ve been talking about it, but recently I’ve been feeling more and more like my energies need to be in the things that God has specifically directed me to do that I’ve put off for… closer to two decades than one. 😅 In fact, I felt like I got a gentle nudge letting me know that if I don’t do this thing that He’s asked me, then He’s going to have someone else do it.
I’d like to do it. I’ve wanted to do it, but I’ve overwhelmed myself with perfectionistic expectations.
I’m not sure exactly where turning toward this road is going to lead me, perhaps away from South Dakota again, we’ll see, maybe even back to Utah.
I don’t know.
What I do think is going to happen is that I’m going to need to spend less time trying to help here on the homefront and more time, dedicated time, to following the direction that God gave me.
I’ve been thinking a fair bit about the good, better, and best pursuits available to me, and how I keep spending my time in good and better pursuits (at least not bad 🙃), but I’ve not been focusing on the best things.
And I guess what I mean by that is that of all the wonderful things that I could be learning and doing, God knows which of those things are of greatest value for me and others (both to learn and to do), and so whatever the direction is that I get from Him, I can be confident that it’s for the very best.
Otherwise… there’s only educated guessing after study and effort.
So, my days are likely going to start looking a lot different than they did today and than they have been looking since I’ve been back in South Dakota.
At least some of them. 🙃
I have no plans to adjust my Temple Tuesday schedule. Yes, I’m filling my life with light on a continual basis everyday, but the temple is just such a wonderful place for me to gain strength. 🤍
Anyway, so that’s where things are at for me right now. 😊
Now back to the hot, hard day of work that it was today. 🙃
The basic goal was to make sure the trench was wide enough for two drain pipes, one solid, and one French, and then get the slope properly set the whole 76-ft length to have a quarter inch of drop every foot.
So much easier said than done–especially for someone like me who wants everything to be exact. 😅
I did mess up in a few spots, forgetting to tamp down the dirt before measuring the height of the bottom of the trench in that portion, which led to me digging down perhaps an eighth to a quarter of an inch deeper than I should have in one or more spots.
Hard work, lots of blisters. 🙃
I’m grateful to Heather, who had the day off, for fixing me a smoothie. 🙏 I can work and work and work until I just about collapse, so it was nice to have the smoothie to give me some calories for my body to function with, and then eventually, an unexpected thunderstorm rolled through, twice, which rescued me from continuing to bust my butt after the point at which I probably should have stopped for the day anyway.
The rain made things a little harder at first, as since I hadn’t finished digging the trench, the sudden downpour meant that all the water collected in the lowest part of the trench but couldn’t go any further because I hadn’t dug that far yet, so I had a big puddle in the middle of the trench. That’s not so good when you need the bottom of the trench to be dry to make sure you’re at the right level.
Apparently not thinking so well, instead of bailing out the water that had come into the trench in and pulled up at the lowest spot, I grabbed the hoe and shovel and started trying to dig down the rest of the trench so the water could flow all the way out.
What that ended up causing was water to fill up the entire trench and create mud throughout the entire length of the trench instead of just in the lowest spot.
😅
Oh well, I at least got the trench to a point where it was draining itself, so that’s… something. And hopefully dry out quicker since I worked hard to get all the water out as quickly as I could.
My back wasn’t happy with me, having done lots of work with mud and water and whatever on the end of the shovel, which acted as a lover to put more strain on my spine.
It wasn’t too bad, but I was definitely starting to get a little sore.
I think it was after calling it good with the trench for the day, I dug out a few large mullein plants that were getting ready to spit some seed stocks out?
Or maybe it was during the first rain?
I’m not remembering the order of events very well as the timeline is quite compressed both in time and in my mind, so some of the evening events might not be in the right order. Oh well. 🙃
Regardless, what do I say to the mullein and their desire to dump hundreds of thousands of seeds all over the backyard?
No. You. Won’t! 🙃
I grabbed the mattock and removed them from the earth, roots and all. No, thank you.
I got a little wet in the process because of the rain, but that was fine. It also hailed a little bit, but nothing bigger than a pea, I don’t think.
Heather spent some time trimming Fiona’s hooves, and I tried to keep her busy by scratching her head and neck, so she’d behave a little bit better during the experience. Fiona can be quite the handful when trying to trim her feet, which is actually physically dangerous if you’re holding on to her while she kicks. 😬
And rain is wonderful and sometimes brings out these to enjoy. 😊
Gratefully, today, she was much easier to work with. 🙏
Heather and I listened to a fabulous talk Q/A discussion thing from a handful of years ago with Elder Bednar. I’ve been listening to more of his stuff recently. 🤍
After that, Cory called, and he and I and Heather had a lovely gospel discussion. 🥰 I’m grateful to be able to have these kinds of exciting, illuminating, and encouraging conversations and experiences. 🥰
Hans was up working at Mount Rushmore to make sure everything was going well with all the festivities up there for our celebration of the 250th Fourth of July, so he was gone all day today working an insanely long shift.
By the time Heather, Cory and I had finished our conversation, we were all pretty tired, so after having a little evening prayer together, the three of us (Cory on the phone), I bet Heather good night as well and headed out to my van.
As I got in my van, I noticed that there were a bunch of flies inside, so I grabbed an empty bottle of salsa and spent a little while catching each of the five biggest flies and then letting them outside.
Lots of effort, but it feels better than killing them. I really dislike the feeling thoughtlessly… coldly killing a creature simply because it annoys me.
But what about sand flies and mosquitoes, Stephen? A bit hypocritical of you, no?
I guess maybe yes. I don’t have an answer for that right now. I just know that I feel like a little part of me dies when out of frustration or annoyance I snuff out the life of another living creature.
It feels barbaric. It feels… so incredibly contrary to my internal sensibilities.
Not sure how to explain the contradiction right now, and I’m not going to take the time to try, but one day I likely will.
Spent a little time journaling, and then I crashed for the night.
Lift the world.
Bring it on.
~ stephen
Lift the World 