Happy Tuesday, y'all. 🙂 No fear, no excuses. (not that I'm living in that, but I'm working on it) I ended up sleeping in today. I was just hammered. Wouldn't have even gotten four hours of sleep if I got up at 4:25, but I will tomorrow morning. 4:25. It's almost 10:15 right now, though, … Continue reading 2021-05-25 — A Few Little Things

Hiya, folks. Hit a bump in the road today. I was doing so well with my porn stuff. I was reaching out with the slightest triggers. I was doing pushups, or sprinting around, or taking a cold shower when I was triggered, so that I could get by body to send its energy elsewhere. I … Continue reading 2021-05-24 — Bump

So.... I think maybe things are coming together a little? We'll see. July 4th is less than a month and a half away. That was my tentative retirement date, and I've made a tentative decision: As soon as all my legal stuff is taken care of with the business, and everything is organized and solid, … Continue reading 2021-05-23 — Coming Together?

Hola folks! Didn't get to bed until after 12:30 a.m., so it wasn't even 4 hours of sleep by 4:25, but guess what? I still got up!!! Wahoo! 🙂 I think that's 6 days in a row now? Yee haw!!! (nevermind that I went back to bed at 7 ish and slept until 10ish) I … Continue reading 2021-05-22 — Gotta Go. Trigger!!!

Today hit hard, but I'm still kicking. 🙂 I spent a good chunk of the day actively trying to hush my fears and focus on positive, uplifting things through this whole experience I'm going through right now. I did decently well. I mean... it was super hard, and I certainly struggled a good bit, but … Continue reading 2021-05-21 — Keeping At It

Hiya, folks. 🙂 Today has been a really really hard day, but I'm here. 🙂 I don't remember when I got to bed. Maybe 11 ish? 12 ish? I don't remember, but I got some messages from a friend about 1:30, and then I worried about what the messages might mean so much I couldn't … Continue reading 2021-05-20 — Moving Forward

No, I haven't been watching the X-Men trilogy (or however many mutant movies there are). Three days in a row!!! Boom!!! Wahoo! 🥳🙂 Honestly, it was harder this morning. For a little bit, I was like, ugh, do I have to do this again? It's gonna be a lot easier once I get myself better … Continue reading 2021-05-19 — X3, + *Another* Reconnection

Might seem a little silly, especially since this once was my norm, but I'm excited to report: Two days in a row! 4:25 a.m. 🥳 I've been struggling so much for so long with what feels like should be simple little exercises of self discipline, and honestly, I don't know where the strength is coming … Continue reading 2021-05-18 — X2

I did it! I got up at 4:25!!! And I had a really solid morning routine, not perfect, but solid. Yay!!! I got up at 4:25, and I did my room 5x5, servicise, shower, pray, meditate, personal gospel study, couple gospel study, and I did the house 5x5. I missed a few 5x5s and I … Continue reading 2021-05-17 — 4 Freaking 25. Thank You, Very Much.

Nice day today. Beautiful, cloudy, breezy day. So nice. I spent a good chunk of the day thinking, pondering, praying, etc. Lots of heavy thoughts. Lots of very weighty things on my mind, but I'm feeling quite a bit better, which is nice. Nice to have a break from the normal stresses of the week. … Continue reading 2021-05-16 — Beautiful Day of Rest