Not much to report.
I went to Miguel’s shop and was able to verify that my Autel Jbox I had listed on eBay is indeed properly functioning. I deleted the ad even though I had offers because I I hadn’t used it in years, and I wanted to make sure that it was still working properly.
After verifying that it was indeed working properly, I relisted it on eBay, so hopefully, I’ll get some bites again here soon.
I was also able to find A repair place willing to rebuild the two cylinder rods for me for my Bobcat. I was a little concerned they might not because I’m supplying the parts, and it’s already mostly taken apart, but it looks like, cross your fingers, they said that that’s no problem.
To my pleasant surprise, I realized that I wasn’t so far behind last month’s just answer pays. I’m a little behind, but not anywhere near what I thought I was. So that’s nice.
I spent some time helping Liz get a refrigerator from Mona’s house over to her house. My new little Rover van has been great for moving things.
Oh, that’s the name my mom gave my new doggy van. Rover. 🙂
Trying to find strength to power through the immediate mountain of stuff to sort through.
I could ease my load a tad bit by choosing different expectations. Choosing to be okay with having things that have gone undone for so long continue to go undone. But with life radically changing, I just… Need to get this stuff done. I don’t want things hanging over my head anymore but have been hitting over my head for so long.
I want to get The projects that I’ve started here on the hill taken care of, so no one on the hill is having to deal with something that I started and left undone.
I want to get my cars sold that I’m not keeping, And I need to make decisions about what I’m keeping and what time not keeping. I have zero attachment to my Volkswagen Beetle. Zero attachment to my Ford E350 work van, the one that CNG. I have zero attachment to my 1998 work van that’s been the main workhorse over the last year and a half, other than that it’s a good work van, so if I continue to work fixing cars at all, it’s a great little van to have.
I don’t want to get rid of my Civic, because it’s the nice little economy car that gets great gas mileage. It’s my only one that gets great gas mileage. I don’t want to get rid of ET, the one I did the road trip around the country with my mom in. That’s got a lot of sentimental value attached to it because of that trip. I don’t want to get rid of my pickup truck because it’s so freaking useful. I’m not going to get rid of the Z3 because, well, I’m just not. And I don’t want to get rid of Rover because I’ve already grown quite attached to it because it’s so freaking useful, and since lacking a place to live shortly, it’s a fabulous place to live. 😅
But I don’t want that many cars to be paying insurance on and that many cars to be paying property taxes on, and I don’t want to have to find places to keep them all.
Anyway, part of my big stresses are because there are so many things that have been on the list to get done for so long, And I just want them all done before this next chapter. Part of the reason that they’ve been on the list for so long is that each one of them is giving me fits.
And in my overall emotional state having been struggling for years, when I get to a point with a project where I get blocked at seemingly every turn, I just sort of shut down. When I get to that point, the very thought of even working on that project is a bit overwhelming, let alone actually trying to work on it.
So now what I have is a mountain of projects Dad are all in that category. Projects that have given me fit after fit after fit in the past, and now I’m trying to get them all done all at once.
It’s a lot of extra pressure on myself, but want to get out of Dodge, and I want to get out of Dodge for a long time to try and Work through the things in my mind that no one else can do for me, decisions that I have to make that no one can make for me. I want to be able to do that without all of these other things hanging in the background, knowing that they have to be done still.
There will always be things to be concerned about. There will always be at least some things hanging in the background, but I don’t need all of these things. These things are removable. So I’m trying to remove them. They were already stressors. They were already on the to-do list. I just ended up with a much shorter timeline than I was expecting.
Once all these extra stressors are taken care of, once more of these daily decisions are made, then I’ll take some much-needed r&r To work on my life’s big stuff… The stuff I was supposed to figure out when I was in New Zealand A year and a half ago.
Lift the world.
~ stephen
Lift the World 