I was up a bit later this morning, probably because I made the rather intelligent decision to scroll YouTube for an hour or an hour and a half last night after getting back from the fireworks. 😶
I didn’t Journal. I didn’t consume light. I did the exact opposite. 😅
Was it any surprise then, when, this morning, I was fighting off darkness and a return, even if only mildly, of previous thought patterns.
It’s amazing how, even though I’m not depressed in the least, how my thought patterns can go straight to being tired of life and being ready for it to be over. Not suicidal. Not even depressed. Just tired and ready to move on.
It’s a quite insidious little thought to come in so quietly with no fanfare whatsoever. No obvious emotion behind it, just… weariness and a well-worn neural pathway to react to that weariness.
Gratefully, it wasn’t long after getting to church that I was able to get the light back, and I even got up to share my testimony today, which was… nice. 😊
Being summertime, we had a fair number of visitors again, I sitting next to a couple of them who were super cool.
I was quite moved as we sang all three verses of The Star-Spangled banner, choking up a bit as we sang it as the closing hymn in sacrament meeting. Having traveled a fair bit around the world, I’ve loved just about every place that I’ve been, but I’m just… grateful for this country. 🙏
Sunday school was also quite uplifting, and it was just great to have a patriotic Sunday. 😊
As is obvious, I spent much of the rest of the day journaling dozing just a little bit, reading online, journaling some more, and working with my sister Heather to re-memorize Moroni chapter 7 verses 45-48.
I love those verses. 🥰
I also have both fun and beautiful memories of those verses.
When I was a 9th grade teacher, my class memorized those verses, and every time I get to a particular part of those verses, I hear the voice of one of the girls in my class loudly yelling out a “the” that she struggled to remember for a while before turning it into a part of the verses that she (and obviously I) would never forget. 😊
I also remember one day when a different girl in my class was trying to pass off those same verses, and she seemed so nervous and so scared, but she just kept working at it, never giving up, unwilling to take the out I offered her, until she completed it–perfectly.
I’ll never forget that. She both melted my heart and gave me a powerful example of courage and perseverance that I’ll remember as long as I live.
🥰
Ummm… I’m missing that we spent some time today trimming Rivers feetsies, and we spent a little time talking about the World cup and other sports. 🙃
And now the day is over, it’s coming up on midnight, and I’m finally caught up with my journal again. 🙏
Several short entries in a row helps. 🙃
Lift the world.
Bring it on.
~ stephen
Lift the World 